Meeting of the Mind-set

I'm eating a bowl of blueberries for breakfast....
That, my friends is what you call progress. I have officially decided to end my love affair with my gigantic (seemingly bottomless) bowl of Raisin Bran Extra I have become so infatuated with eating each morning, because I finally realized where all that "Extra" was going. (See pic from yesterday's post if you need clarification).
There is something about today that makes me feel like I am truly on the road to success. Granted it is only Day 2 of this re-dedication to my weight-loss journey, but I feel a little like I have been given a renewed sense of purpose, pride and strength and for whatever reason, I'm confident that I can do this.
Maybe it's because when I stepped on the scale this morning, it was moving in the right direction. I was at 232.25 today....a small gift from the fat gods for behaving yesterday, perhaps?
Or maybe it's because the sun in shining and it's the first day in a looooong time the temperature is going to hit near 70 degrees and the feeling of spring is in the air. It's been a long cold winter, that was filled with many days of eating comfort foods until my heart was content. Look at where that got me. I need to remember this moment, complete with the shooting pain in my knees, and draw on it the next time I think it's OK to fall off the wagon.
It may be time to stick that bread machine in the basement for a while. Sorry, honey.
As a part of this weight loss process, I have decided to take a serious look at those things that have not worked in the past - and also to look at those things that I tried to do, but maybe not exactly whole-heartedly, therefore hindering the shedding of the weight. What I have been thinking about the last few days is the fact that often when I eat, I am not even doing it consciously. That has always been a huge issue with me and I think a pretty good indicator of how I have packed on the pounds throughout my life.
The other day I found myself grabbing a bag of croutons off the counter and just sitting in the living room, talking to Josh, shoveling them in my mouth as if I was in some kind of contest to see who could eat the most salad toppings in one sitting. I mean come on - croutons???? I probably downed half the bag before I realized what I was doing. Granted, they weren't M&M's or french fries - but the problem remains the same. I was eating without really realizing it - or caring that I was doing it.
These are not normal eating habits - it's grabbing anything in sight and feeding the disease.....I can't tell you if I was hungry, bored, or simply out of control. All I do know is that croutons are not a meal, and I had no right to be treating them as such.
So, no more of doing that. If I pick it up to eat it, I better damn well at least know if I am even hungry. And if I am, I won't be eating croutons. I'll eat an apple.
Little changes are what is going to help me do this. Conscientious thinking....being aware of what I really need, instead of what I think I want.
No more being jealous of others. That too, I realize gets me nowhere fast. Instead I need to keep the focus right here - on me. One day at a time. It sounds cliche but that's my approach. Don't look too far in the future. Get through today, get through tomorrow and eventually, once all those tomorrows are in the rearview mirror, I can look back and see how far I've come....